An 89-year-old man at the retirement home got down on one knee and asked me to marry him

one thing you are supposed to be doing.

What I said.

I said no.

Not in that room — I did not say anything at all in that room, I got him up and sat him down and somebody brought tea and the trolley girl told everybody it was a lovely thing and the whole thing turned into an anecdote inside about four minutes.

I said no on the Friday, in his room, with the door open.

And I want to put down what I actually said, because it took me two days to find it and because I think it was the only correct sentence available.

I said: “I’m not marrying you, Alby. But I’m not leaving it either. Give me a fortnight.”

And he said: “I’ve had nine months.”

And I said: “I know. Give me a fortnight.”

What the fortnight was.

Phone calls. That is the whole of