For years I believed the nanny had walked out of my life

to hear him say it.

“I have another grandmother.”

“Happy birthday again, son,” Dad said when he answered.

“Anna was here.”

Silence.

Not “Anna who?”

Just silence.

“Is she really my mother?”

Dad exhaled.

“George…”

“Is she?”

“Yes!”

“Anna was here.”

I closed my eyes.

“Why did you tell me she stole from us?”

He sighed. “I needed you to stop looking for her.”

“Why?”

“Because she was going to turn your life upside down, while I was the one raising you.”

“So was she!”

He went quiet.

I closed my eyes.

“You told me my mother was dead.”

“I thought it was simpler, George.”

“Simple for whom?”

He didn’t answer.

Finally, he said, “I was scared she’d take you.”

“Did she ever threaten to?”

“No.”

“Then you weren’t protecting me. You were protecting yourself.”

Silence.

“Simple for whom?”

 

 

Then Dad’s voice got louder.

“Don’t tell me how